So what is it about Loving that requires courage? Hm...good question. Not sure if we can fully answer that question - so will just share some of my TEA - (thoughts, experience and advice).
A long time ago, before I got married, I heard someone say that "love is acting in the other person's best interest". Talk about a tall order!
The Bible is more direct and descriptive in 1 Corinthians 13: 4 - 8a:
Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily.
It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God's love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].
It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail.
Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening].
Love never fails [never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end]. (Amplified Bible)
So do you think that we need courage to be able to show this level of love - love that lasts? Let's think (& talk) about it a bit...the Bible says that we should love our neighbours as we love ourselves. Tell me, how can you love others as yourself if you don't know how to love yourself? Sadly, too many of us look to others - husband, children, family, friends - to love (& accept) us as we are but we can't bear to accept, let alone love, ourselves. Possibly because we feel we have failed ourselves and/or others and are not worthy of any love.
Courage is not just about facing fear or pain, it's also about facing difficulty or uncertainty. I don't know about you, but I've been in some situations where it's been difficult for me to face myself let alone love myself.
When I felt like that, I further felt undeserving of any other person's love even God's love that is unconditional. It's like being between a rock and a hard place - I really wanted to be and feel loved and yet, I wanted people around me to ignore me altogether. It took courage to be able to accept and appreciate God's love and to learn to love myself and extend that love to others. Elbert Hubbard put is succinctly when he said: "The love we give away is the only love we keep."
What starts on the inside is easy to show on the outside...once you learn to accept and appreciate yourself as you are, the easier it will be to love, accept and appreciate others. We must all strive to be like God who loves us unconditionally - He loves sinners and hates sin.
Let's learn to love people enough to say "no" to them (without feeling guilty) or to tell them when we feel or know that they are going the wrong way - this ranges from our family to our friends.
Have you read the book "Dare to Discipline" by Dr James Dobson? Ok, what about "Kingdom Parenting" by Dr Myles Munroe? The Fine Art of Friendship: Building and Maintaining Quality Relationships by Ted Engstrom is also another really good book to read. Remember, Readers are Leaders...Talking about friends, I like the Contemporary English Version of Proverbs 27:6 - "You can trust a friend who corrects you, but kisses from an enemy are nothing but lies." We all need to realise that those that correct us are doing it out of love for us - that's a tough one especially when we feel that a friend or even family member is extra critical - I know cos I feel that way about my husband sometimes.
I'll take this a step further - to our colleagues/subordinates @ work and students @ school/church. One of my former bosses kept on talking about the "Rights of a child". He said that every child had a right to be: Cared for, Counselled and also to be Corrected. He said (& I agree) that even our subordinates @ work have the equivalent "rights" in the work place setting. Now it takes courage to "love" our colleagues/subordinates @ work and/or students @ school/church enough to help them become the best they can be.
Ok so much has been said about love...it's still about acting in the other person's best interest - and that takes courage. We could go on and on (and you're welcome to send us an email using the address on the blogspot)...
...let's wrap this piece up with what Jean Anouilh said:
"Love is, above all, the gift of oneself" (to oneself and to others - added by me).
No comments:
Post a Comment