Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Do you have “staying power”?

Some weeks ago, while waiting for my plane an older couple came and sat next to me. Within 5 minutes of their being there I couldn’t imagine how they could have stayed married so long. I mean, the man sounded so mean and his wife responded so sweetly almost meekly.

She went to get some food to eat, he said she was an eating machine – then ate off her plate.

A little later, he asked her to scratch his back in a way that almost sounded romantic.

Then about an hour later when she was giving him his medication and making suggestions he responded like a school principal and she responded like she was his kindergarten teacher – nice match I’d say.

I know every marriage is different – this one was so very different from anything I’ve ever seen. I just kept saying to myself: “If he’s like this in the public...can’t imagine how he is in private.” I practically got goose bumps and almost the hiccups thinking about it - so I didn't let my imagination continue on that path.

One thing I learned from my endurance test of sitting beside them for about 2 hours or so was how confidently a gentle answer turns away anger*. I thought I was “good” – now I met “better”. I mean, my husband is not anything like this man – may he never be too – but the vibes that I was receiving were just scary and almost scarring. By the time they left for their flight, they had left a definite impression in my mind - of who I don't want to ever be...

The other thing I learned and purpose to keep doing is being respectful to my husband at home. If I remain respectful to my husband at home, being respectful outside will not need me to get into a costume because it will already be my custom.

Lastly, I was reminded that marriage is all about staying power. Ok I may be the only one that this happens to but I’ll let you decide for yourself. Sometimes, things happen in my home that upset me. It’s not a time to look for honey or let out the vinegar that is so eager to be released** sometimes I feel that the jar just needs to be out of the cupboard altogether.

When I remember all the promises God made and has continued to fulfill, I know without a doubt that I’ve got the power on my side to stay married. If you prayed before you got married and married the person God asked you to – you have all the power on your side. Even if you didn’t and you are (now) a Christian, you’ve got the power – God has given us the power to be His children and one sign is we are able stay married - because noone (including you) is allowed to separate you from your spouse - since God has put you together.***
May God bless & keep you - happily married for life.



Reference:
* Prov 15:1 A gentle answer quiets anger, but a harsh one stirs it up. (GNT)
***And no one should separate a couple that God has joined together." (Mark 10:9 - CEV)

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