As I prepared to write (type) up on this next secret: Character, I looked over some quotations I had gathered and was asking God & myself what the context should be – then the word “ACE” came to mind. So we’ll use it as our acronym…
A: Association
Encarta defines “Character” as "distinctive qualities: the set of qualities that make somebody or something distinctive, especially somebody's qualities of mind and feeling; positive qualities: qualities that make somebody or something interesting or attractive; and reputation: somebody's public reputation."** Taking these one step further: “Character is so largely affected by association, that we cannot afford to be indifferent as to who or what our friends are.” ~ Author unknown
The flip side of that is: “When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends.” Japanese proverb
The fact that we need to know who (and what) our friends are cannot be overemphasized. You cannot choose who your family members are/will be and you may not have much control over what they are/become but it’s different with friends. In fact, thinking about friends and family, you can only choose your spouse – who hopefully started off as a friend before being “promoted” by marriage to family – now that’s one area we must all be careful about.
I know that some of us have family members who we relate to as friends…we also need to be careful in those choices. In 2 Samuel 13, we see how a young man died prematurely because of the counsel of his cousin-friend – who eventually told others why the young man died (verse 32).
The Bible warns us about our associations:
Proverbs 22:24-25 - Don’t befriend angry people or associate with hot-tempered people, or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul.***
1 Corinthians 15:33 - Do not be so deceived and misled! Evil companionships (communion, associations) corrupt and deprave good manners and morals and character. ****
We learn from our friends...some of their attitudes rub off on us and become part of our character. Watch yourself, have you noticed how you think, speak or respond like some of your friends? For example, a friend might say "wow" a lot during conversations and you may have caught yourself saying that as well.
Do your friends make you a better person?
Do for feel an increase or drain after you spend time with them?
When you’re confused or undecided, do your friends help you put things in perspective or just increase the confusion?
If you answer these questions honestly and act on the answers, you’re well on your way to building your character…by maintaining the right associations. I believe that ”Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.” Tennessee Williams
So we don't end on the wrong note, please realise that a friend is not a person who agrees with you all the time in other words, “A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.” (Arnold H. Glasgow) With how much impact some of my friends have made (or not made) in my life…this is one areas of life I hold dear – we’ll be talking some more about friendship…watch out for the postings.
God bless
Sources:
**http://encarta.msn.com/encnet/features/dictionary/DictionaryResults.aspx?lextype=3&search=character
*** New Living Translation
****Amplified Bible
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