Communication tips

Let me start by wishing you a "Happy World Communications Day"
(Guess what: I just found by chance - reiterating the importance of following the Holy Spirit's leading)

A lot has been said about communication and I can't help but wonder if anyone is listening. Personally, I believe we'll be effective communicators if we take Dianna Booher's advice on communication:

"When you listen first then speak your heart with clarity and courtesy, you can lead others to change attitudes, behaviours and situations."

Over time I've written about communication - starting with the Secrets of Success* series.

Indeed it's an open secret that good & effective communication is a key to success.**

Communication is basically the exchange of information...and to be effective you must: 

• Spend time to consider what is being said and what is not being send i.e. listen
• Speak from your core (heart) - be careful that what you feel is real
• Speak with clarity - ensure that you know and mean what you say
• Speak with courtesy - your words should be laced with kindness and "salt"

Better communication is not the same as more communication. We must focus on improving the quality, not necessarily the quantity, of our communication - here are a few tips:

Communication works for those who work at it. ~ John Powell

The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn't being said. ~ Peter Drucker

The two words 'information' and 'communication' are often used interchangeably, 

but they signify quite different things. 

Information is giving out; communication is getting through. ~ Sydney J. Harris

I also enjoyed reading this Message from Pope Francis as part of the celebration of this year's World Communications Day. It has so many nuggets of how we all can and should utilize and maximize this period of lock down - as we communicate through stories. Keep communicating.

References:

*http://sapphire-and-beryl.blogspot.ca/2009/10/esther-effect.html

http://sapphire-and-beryl.blogspot.ca/2010/03/secret-4-communication.html

http://sapphire-and-beryl.blogspot.ca/2010/03/secret-4-communication-speech.html

http://sapphire-and-beryl.blogspot.ca/2010/03/secret-4-communication-script.html

http://sapphire-and-beryl.blogspot.ca/2010/03/secret-4-communication-signals.html

http://sapphire-and-beryl.blogspot.ca/2010/03/secret-4-communication-silence.html

http://sapphire-and-beryl.blogspot.ca/2010/03/seven-sayings-on-speech-and-silence.html

http://sapphire-and-beryl.blogspot.ca/2010/04/secret-5-character-ace_23.html

http://sapphire-and-beryl.blogspot.ca/2010/05/secret-4-communication-addendum.html

**http://www.reliableplant.com/Read/12675/communication-most-important-key-to-leadership-success

For Fathers...

I wanted to give fathers a gift today...a gift of how to be even better fathers. The way I see it if Fathers apply at least 2-3 of these tips, they'll be gifts that your children will never forget and you'll never regret giving... 

MFM

Happy New Month. Welcome to the beginning of the end of the first quarter of the year. Including today, we have exactly 300 days to go before this "New Year" is history.

I wonder if you're feeling the way I have been feeling this year. After all I went through last year, I was really looking forward to this year. God has also given me so many words and pointers to confirm how amazing this year will be for me...so I've been very expectant.

The days are going by rather quickly...and as I looked forward to this month, I heard the Lord say: "MFM." I can imagine that some of you are already thinking about what "MFM" means - possibly based on the fact that you know something that MFM stands for.

Choose one...

I'm sure you cannot but agree with me that life is full of options. When torn between more than 2 options, it can be hard to decide ...ask me about when I had to "decide" between more than 2 prospects in a destiny determining matter...that's another day's story.

God obviously didn't want to complicate our lives any further so He has given us all 2 options when it comes to life and death. Did you know that we all have the choice to:

About Attitude...

I saw this on one of my Facebook friends' page:

A bad attitude is like a flat tire...

...you cannot go anywhere until you change it!!!

When I read, I couldn't agree more and then added that "for those who have tried to drive with a flat tire, they have found out that something more than the tire was destroyed - in most cases the rim was also a write-off. I know that from personal experience - I mean the tire & rim example :)

Things to remember...on one hand...

0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

1] Prayer is not a "spare wheel" that you pull out when in trouble, but it is a "steering wheel" that directs the right path throughout your life. A very wise person said: Prayer should be our first port of call and not a last resort.

2] Do you know why a car’s WINDSHIELD is so large & the Rear-view Mirror is so small? Because our PAST is not as important as our FUTURE. Look Ahead and Move on! (Byrd Baggett: Look at life through the windshield, not the rear-view mirror”) Look/go  forward...you cannot live in reverse.

3] Often when we lose hope and think this is the end, GOD smiles from above and says, "Relax, it's just a bend, not the end!"
A wise unknown person said:

"A bend in the road is not the end of the road...

  unless you fail to make the turn."

There will always be bends and bumps on the way to your destiny. Decide and keep moving forward...

4] A blind person asked Swami Vivekanand: "Can there be anything worse than losing eye sight?" He replied: "Yes, losing your vision!"

5] WORRYING does not take away tomorrow’s TROUBLES, it takes away today’s PEACE! And, "Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow. It empties today of its strength.

(Corrie Ten Boom)

The Strangest Secret (5)

30-DAY ACTION IDEAS FOR PUTTING THE STRANGEST SECRET TO WORK FOR YOU

For the next 30-days follow each of these steps every day until you have achieved your goal. I'm posting this today on purpose. It's my prayer that posting this on the leap day of this year will motivate you to LEAP into achieving your goals. The other reason is so you have 30 of the 31 days in March to take these steps, have a day's break and then restart in April before you know it, this will be part of the way you live each day..."AMEN!" to both.

1. Write on a card what it is you want more that anything else. It may be more money. Perhaps you'd like to double your income or make a specific amount of money. It may be a beautiful home. It may be success at your job. It may be a particular position in life. It could be a more harmonious family. The key thing is that it is YOUR goal.

Write down on your card specifically what it is you want. Make sure it's a single goal and clearly defined. You needn't show it to anyone, but carry it with you so that you can look at it several times a day. Think about it in a cheerful, relaxed, positive way each morning when you get up, and immediately you have something to work for — something to get out of bed for, something to live for. Motivate yourself to get up & go for it!

Look at it every chance you get during the day and just before going to bed at night. As you look at it, remember that you must become what you think about, and since you're thinking about your goal, you realize that soon it will be yours. In fact, it's really yours the moment you write it down and begin to think about it. A wise unknown person said: "Write it down. Written goals have a way of transforming wishes into wants; can'ts into cans; dreams into plans; and plan into reality. Don't just think it - ink it!"

LEAP!

Wow! Today is the "Leap Day" in this unique year...

While praying this morning, I felt led to encourage us all to consciously LEAP as a way of life.

Leaping is: "a light springing movement upwards or forwards"* and that's my point exactly...it is an action. We need to always be moving upwards and forward to accomplish our purpose in life.

To truly LEAP, I recommend at least 4 things:

The Strangest Secret (4)

AS YE SOW — SO SHALLYE REAP
The human mind is much like a farmer's land. The land gives the farmer a choice. He may plant in that land whatever he chooses. The land doesn't care what is planted. It's up to the farmer to make the decision. The mind, like the land, will return what you plant, but it doesn't care what you plant. If the farmer plants too seeds — one a seed of corn, the other nightshade, a deadly poison, waters and takes care of the land, what will happen?

The Strangest Secret (3)

This is The Strangest Secret! Now, why do I say it's strange, and why do I call it a secret? Actually, it isn't a secret at all. It was first promulgated by some of the earliest wise men, and it appears again and again throughout the Bible. But very few people have learned it or understand it. That's why it's strange, and why for some equally strange reason it virtually remains a secret.

Marcus Aurelius, the great Roman Emperor, said:

"A man's life is what his thoughts make of it."

Disraeli said this:
"Everything comes if a man will only wait ... a human being with a settled purpose must accomplish it, and nothing can resist a will that will stake even existence for its fulfillment."

The Strangest Secret (2)

GOALS
Have you ever wondered why so many people work so hard and honestly without ever achieving anything in particular, and why others don't seem to work hard, yet seem to get everything? They seem to have the "magic touch." You've heard people say, "Everything he touches turns to gold." Have you ever noticed that a person who becomes successful tends to continue to become more successful? And, on the other hand, have you noticed how someone who's a failure tends to continue to fail?

The difference is goals.

People with goals succeed because they know where they're going.

Interestingly, the prophetic theme in our church this month is: "I will reach my goal." The way I see it, to reach your goal, you must be "willing" to. It's that simple. Failures, on the other hand, believe that their lives are shaped by circumstances...by things that happen to them...by exterior forces. Failures let things happen to them instead of making things happen for them. Are you a "let-ter" or a "maker" like God?

Think of a ship with the complete voyage mapped out and planned. The captain and crew know exactly where the ship is going and how long it will take — it has a definite goal. And 9,999 times out of 10,000, it will get there. Just like Geoffrey F. Abert said: 

"The most important thing about goals is having one."

Now let's take another ship — just like the first — only let's not put a crew on it, or a captain at the helm. Let's give it no aiming point, no goal, and no destination. We just start the engines and let it go. I think you'll agree that if it gets out of the harbor at all, it will either sink or wind up on some deserted beach — a derelict. It can't go anyplace because it has no destination and no guidance. Mark Victor Hansen put it succintly:

"You fail at a 100% of the goals you don't set."

Heart truth

Every month should be "Heart month" and the reason is simple...

we need our hearts every day (of our lives).

To get the best out of our hearts, we need to give the best to our hearts. In other words, if you want your heart to treat you well, treat it well too.

People usually talk about the hard truth as a difficult thing to pass on. Well, in this case, I might as well share the hard-Heart truth with us:

The Strangest Secret...

I got this excerpt of "The Strangest Secret" by Earl Nightingale* last year. It's a rather lengthy piece so I'll share it in five "manageable" bits...
as usual, italics, comments in green font and pictures are mine:

Some years ago, the late Nobel prize-winning Dr. Albert Schweitzer was asked by a reporter, "Doctor, what's wrong with men today?" The great doctor was silent a moment, and then he said, "Men simply don't think!"

It's about this that I want to talk with you. We live today in a golden age. This is an era that humanity has looked forward to, dreamed of, and worked toward for thousands of years.

We live in the richest era that ever existed on the face of the earth ... a land of abundant opportunity for everyone. However, if you take 100 individuals who start even at the age of 25, do you have any idea what will happen to those men and women by the time they're 65? These 100 people believe they're going to be successful. They are eager toward life, there is a certain sparkle in their eye, an erectness to their carriage, and life seems like a pretty interesting adventure to them.

Read the Handbook

Have you read the Employee Handbook for the company you work in? Ok - did I go too far? How many of you have even ever seen it? Ok one more step back - do you know whether or not your company has one? 

It is so funny that a lot of people want to get some benefits or shall I say "privileges" from their employers and don't realize that sometimes with they are even short-changing themselves - because what they are asking for has already been offered to them in the Handbook. I remember someone telling me that people in a particular company miss out on some privileges (and even their rights) because they do not take the time to find out what the company has to offer them - and sometimes some of those "offers" extend benefits to their families. What a "loss!"

Doesn't that sound so familiar? Well it does to me. There are a lot of Christians who are not living the abundant life* or the life of abundance** - they are simply losing out of a fulfilling and fulfilled life due to their "ignorance." The Bible is our Life Handbook. The Bible tells us about our "rights" and privileges are - for instance, God loads us with benefits every day.***

If you don't read this Handbook, you will not know which benefits accrue to you.

Hosea 14:2a says we should take words with us to the Lord....and that is also the way we get some benefits from our employers. When you know what is due to you by name - because it is written, it is easier to ask for and receive it - and you will know what you have received.

Read the Handbook - you'll be glad you did.

References:

*John 10:10 - The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows). (Amplified)

**Eph 1:3 - All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ. (New Living Translation)

2 Pet 1:3 - God’s divine power has given us everything we need for life and for godliness. This power was given to us through knowledge of the one who called us by his own glory and integrity. (God's Word Translation)

Phil 4:19 - And with all his abundant wealth through Christ Jesus, my God will supply all your needs. (Good News Translation)

***Blessed be the Lord, Who daily loads us with benefits, The God of our salvation! Selah (New King James Version)

Stick with it!

I saw a great quote that set me thinking. First the quote then my thoughts...

Consider the postage stamp:

its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.

~Josh Billings

Who do you think you are?

That's an interesting question especially when followed by the question: "Who are you?"

My family and I stumbled on a portion of that show a few months ago. An actress went on a journey to discover who her ancestors were. At the end when she shared her findings with her mother, she was happy for her and made a statement worth pondering and acting on:

 "The most important thing about our history is what we learn from it."

So who do you think or, better still, know you are?

A lot of us may not be able to relate with that actress who didn't know who her ancestors or or even by those who do not know who their parents are or who one of their parents were. I remember watching an almost frightening movie several years ago - can't even remember the title. Well, the gist of the movie was that two women had their babies in the same remote hospital and the hospital staff unintentionally switched the babies. (The title of the movie may have been as obvious as "Switched at Birth" - not 100% sure.) Well, one family was really wealthy and the other wasn't, so you can only imagine how the not so wealthy family's child turned out to be sickly and very unlike their other children.

The Bible

The Bible:

Know it in your head,

Stow it in your heart,

Show it in your life,

Sow it in the world. 

~ ODB

I like this quote because it simply reminds us all that there is no value in having our bible under our pillow.

Determine to know, stow, show and sow it -

remember, it is our daily bread.

Let's be clear: There's nothing wrong with reading it on your bed. It's just more benefical for you to sleep with the Word in your heart not under your head.

The Amplified version of Psalm 19:7 - 11 puts it this way:

⁷The law of the Lord is perfect, restoring the [whole] person;
the testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple.

⁸The precepts of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart;
the commandment of the Lord is pure and bright, enlightening the eyes.

⁹The [reverent] fear of the Lord is clean, enduring forever;
the ordinances of the Lord are true and righteous altogether.

¹⁰More to be desired are they than gold, even than much fine gold;
they are sweeter also than honey and drippings from the honeycomb.

¹¹Moreover, by them is Your servant warned (reminded, illuminated, and instructed);
and in keeping them there is great reward.

Read, live and share the Word to get the reward.

Step on it...

A few months ago, our church's theme for the month was:

Be of Good Courage!

A lot is to be said about Courage so let's just start with Encarta's definition:
Courage is the "quality of being brave: the ability to face danger, difficulty, uncertainty, or pain without being overcome by fear or being deflected from a chosen course of action."*

It's an interesting definition because it can be summarized in a 2-word command from God:

Self-first is not selfishness...

I know you may not agree with me off the bat...

well, neither did I until I got some more insight.

I feel very strongly about this because of how "giving" some of us are (P.S. I know the right word may be  generous; but "giving" appeals to me at this time). So let's go on...

Be empowered...

God has spoken once, twice have I heard this: that power belongs to God. (Ps 62:11 Amp)

I wonder how many of us have seen and meditated on this verse.

Well, the past 2 weekends God said one thing and made me hear it twice.